Writings during Crorona Crisis
Writings during Crorona Crisis
27/03/20
1. am
It occurred to me that I need to get paper to write. I keep loosing work due to broken laptops, relying too much on digital storage. This global pandemic has made me think differently. One day, it's inevitable that there will be no internet. Not necessarily in my lifetime, however I suspect it could be. It's not important, the point is. Paper can be burned, however, so long as it is in existence it can be read, accessed. Without depending on technology. Something which has on the surface improved our lives, but has it? It has, and it hasn't. Truth is, technology is like most things, a little can be good but too much is not. We lose our independence, no longer necessary to research facts in a book, ask google. As if google has integrity, a trustworthy source.
Fake news, everywhere. Fake news. A term brought into my conscious by Trump. Not for my benefit but for his. As much as I feel sick to my stomach that Trump introduced this term and many adopted it, it's a good term. For what is fake news? Propaganda. Something long etched into most if not all of our lives. Trump gave me this term, one good act. Not deliberate. Quite the opposite, however it is vital to question what we are told, taught and bred to believe.
I'm tiered. Mind burnt out from typing. I must manage my resilient, strong but fragile brain.
I'm tiered. Mind burnt out from typing. I must manage my resilient, strong but fragile brain.
14.34
Slept late. Sleep patterns actually better than normal. Not in sync with social norms but I wake up happier, more rested. Have been dreaming, nice dreams. Cannot remember any now but they were pleasant. Yesterday I left a filled dog bone that neither my, nor my housemates dog was interested in on the shed roof, an experiment of sorts. I figured either the gulls or crows would have at it. Most likely the crows. I was correct. I've just spied a crow pecking out the nutritious bounty. An older grow, weathered and wise. Our garden currently stocked with three species of bird. A crow, two blackbirds and a handful of pigeons. It's good for my soul. All in all there are Gulls, Crows, Magpies, Pigeons, Blackbirds, Robins, and a few other types of smaller bird I have yet to learn the names of.
The gulls are compliant, a solid glance to inform them the food is for the other birds and they move away. I like gulls but they are too noisy and scare people. Plus, they are well equipped to find food elsewhere with a longer range and the ability to fend of most challengers. So they have to sneak in and out stealth-fully. I'm aware that some people wouldn't approve of flocks of seagulls making nearby their primary stomping ground. I'm not so hippy dippy and daft that I'll encourage them too much, plus, they are formidable beasts/warriors/scavengers. My observations are that Crows are top of the order, they are highly intelligent, confident kings of the garden birds. Then it's hard to know. Magpies are hard enough but less than the crows. Blackbirds will often descend in groups, if there are seven or more little scares them. Each beak a sword, in numbers they come well armed. There behaviour changes if they are two or three.
The little birds such as robins and sparrows (need to check if they are sparrows) have speed as advantage. They don't take chances, moving in cautiously and out swiftly. With the amount of food they can manage they are no real threat to the crows which are intelligent enough to chose their battles. Avoiding most through strength of street cred. Or shed cred. Bird cred? Fuckit, they got game is all.
The pigeons, bottom but for their adopted father, me. Apparently they can distinguish between humans using face recognition. Certainly they are the only birds that eat from my bedroom window ledge. Sometimes they fight. My God desires don't stand for that. I won't have fighting on my ledge.
My God desires, well it's occurred to me that to an extent I am playing God or a dictator to these birds. Because I think I know best. I do not. For example, it occurred to me that allowing a pecking order is the best way to ensure they don't gather in greater numbers than say 7 to 10 which is more than enough. I'm still learning, every day. I can stop learning when I am dead or broken perhaps.
Anyway, the pigeons are my favourites. The crows most impressive, the gulls formidable, magpies gloriously turned out. The blackbirds a testament to strength in numbers. The smaller birds are cute and endearing in the way they peck and hop. But the pigeons are my favourite. Considered vermin, pests, dirty. Whereas doves, the same bird, are admired. Fuck that. I'm with the street birds.
Pigeons sometimes appear to operate with something of a hive mind. In truth it's more of a flock mentality, one gets startled they all follow. Not always but often. A good strategy. Keeps them safe.
Tiered now, mentally. 15.26. I'll continue later....
Pigeons sometimes appear to operate with something of a hive mind. In truth it's more of a flock mentality, one gets startled they all follow. Not always but often. A good strategy. Keeps them safe.
Tiered now, mentally. 15.26. I'll continue later....
19.07
Just eaten two packs of cheap chicken noodles. They hit the spot, lovely. Productive day, cleaned living room a bit, moved my bedroom around so that my bed is no longer against the wall with the highest concentration of black mould. It smells rather unpleasant. Far from ideal and should have been sorted but I'm still lucky to have a roof over my head and my health. Life for me isn't too bad.
Lost my flow earlier on and it hasn't come back so there's little point in bleating on.
28/03/20
15.03
Been up for about an hour. Slept for periods of day yesterday, then lay in bed watching documentaries from about 1 am to 6 am. WW2. Reflecting upon the madness and seeing patterns that mesh slightly with today. A cruise ship of Jewish refugees was turned away from Cuba, they sailed to the USA. They were refused asylum. Some people committed suicide by throwing themselves overboard. The rest went back to Germany. Many to be forced into concentration camps, exploited and murdered by the Nazi's.
There was a particularly sadistic woman, the wife of a high ranking SS man, she would keep an eye out for prisoners with interesting tattoos. Request their name/number. Then she'd requestion their cured skin to make lampshades, chairs, anything that could make a nice conversation piece. These items were sold and shipped worldwide. It struck me, she was like Cruella Devile. Perhaps worse.
This was not solely a German activity. This inhumane trophy collecting. In the pacific war against the Japanese, skulls and other body parts were taken from the corpses of Japanese soldiers, boiled in order to strip them of their skin, bleached and sent home for keepsakes, ornaments, trophies of war. This happened in an age long after this sort of ritual was abnormal in our societies. It wasn't that long ago and people have not changed significantly, a little bit of propaganda can normalise all sorts of disgusting behaviour.
There was a particularly sadistic woman, the wife of a high ranking SS man, she would keep an eye out for prisoners with interesting tattoos. Request their name/number. Then she'd requestion their cured skin to make lampshades, chairs, anything that could make a nice conversation piece. These items were sold and shipped worldwide. It struck me, she was like Cruella Devile. Perhaps worse.
This was not solely a German activity. This inhumane trophy collecting. In the pacific war against the Japanese, skulls and other body parts were taken from the corpses of Japanese soldiers, boiled in order to strip them of their skin, bleached and sent home for keepsakes, ornaments, trophies of war. This happened in an age long after this sort of ritual was abnormal in our societies. It wasn't that long ago and people have not changed significantly, a little bit of propaganda can normalise all sorts of disgusting behaviour.
Then there were the camps, upon liberation primarily by the Russians. The pictures and anecdotes were sent to the west. Ignored. Due to a mixture of disbelief, indifference & mistrust of the Russians. Mostly due to disbelief, but mistrust and indifference to suffering were a factors as well.
The western media failed to publish these accounts. Western media that has and still does publish all manner of spurious stories without verification. For it's own ends. A quick fact. When posting an article online linked to right wing news such as the Daily Mail their presence is enhanced. Every click or engagement increases their online presence pushing them higher up the pecking order of search engines. They are fully aware of this. We are not.
Then there was Hiroshima.... and Nagasaki.
After successfully testing the worlds first nuclear super weapon, the USA were ready to test it for real. Franklin Roosevelt, The U.S. president for much of WW2 (until his death in 1945) trusted very few people, Fleet Admiral William D. Leahy who acted as Personal Chief of Staff the the President from 1942 until 1949 was possibly Roosevelt's most trusted advisor. Certainly one of very few people President Roosevelt trusted. Leahy was a strong opponent of using the Bomb as a weapon seeing it as fundamentally unethical and a last resort better used as a huge bargaining chip/ credible threat. Upon his death in 1945 Roosevelt was succeeded by Harry Truman, a man with a lack of experience. Kept out of the loop by Roosevelt, unaware until taking office of the existence of the bomb. Truman, in the unenviable position of having to choose between the military invasion of Japan and the loss of many tens of thousands of lives, civilian and his own troupes and the nuclear option.
Then there was Hiroshima.... and Nagasaki.
After successfully testing the worlds first nuclear super weapon, the USA were ready to test it for real. Franklin Roosevelt, The U.S. president for much of WW2 (until his death in 1945) trusted very few people, Fleet Admiral William D. Leahy who acted as Personal Chief of Staff the the President from 1942 until 1949 was possibly Roosevelt's most trusted advisor. Certainly one of very few people President Roosevelt trusted. Leahy was a strong opponent of using the Bomb as a weapon seeing it as fundamentally unethical and a last resort better used as a huge bargaining chip/ credible threat. Upon his death in 1945 Roosevelt was succeeded by Harry Truman, a man with a lack of experience. Kept out of the loop by Roosevelt, unaware until taking office of the existence of the bomb. Truman, in the unenviable position of having to choose between the military invasion of Japan and the loss of many tens of thousands of lives, civilian and his own troupes and the nuclear option.
29/03/20 16.42
Ran into a brick wall with that last scribble. Mildly hungover today. A few Guinness' and a pint of rum and coke last night/this morning. Currently watching Trapped In Space on Youtube. A 1995 Movie based on an Arthur C Clarke. Short story – Breaking Strain. It's got pretty bad reviews on Imdb but from what I've seen so far it's not too bad. It looks very dated for 1995, but the script and actors are good. I've seen far worse films with much bigger budgets. I'm thinking it has the makings of a low budget classic. Certainly better than some theatrical lovey-fest or a self indulgent made for TV movie.
Best of all, it's under the radar enough to exist on youtube so one doesn't need netflix or other streaming services to watch.
Anyway, I'm going to try and continue being constructive today. Took the dog for two decent walks yesterday. One official combined with a trip to the shop to pick up supplies and then one very late moonlit walk. I'm aware that we're supposed to limit our leaving the house to once a day unless essential but as far as I am aware that is for social distancing purposes. After 1 am the streets are empty so I figure a walk at that time is pretty safe. It's bloody hard or near impossible to social distance. In the shops one cannot avoid the wankers who are right in your space. Tesco have measures in place with an entrance and an exit door but do not enforce social distancing in store. In Lidl I had some nugget come and stand right up behind me when I was at the checkout despite markings on the floor and constant announcements through the public address system to encourage people to respect others and stick to safe distancing. In truth, it's impossible to safe distance in shops. There isn't the space to keep a two metre distance. It would take years to shop and with the amount of people needing essentials it's logistically impossible to facilitate. However, that doesn't mean there's a reason to crawl up someone's arse like the bellend in Lidl. Nor do eejits like the woman at the cigarette counter queue in Tesco need to stand less than two metres away from the person in front of her. I guess the thing is, we're not going to get the social distancing perfect but so long as we try our best, accepting the fact that it's not fully possible and some people are stupid and/or selfish we can lessen the foothold the virus has. All we can do is try.
Anyway, I'm going to try and continue being constructive today. Took the dog for two decent walks yesterday. One official combined with a trip to the shop to pick up supplies and then one very late moonlit walk. I'm aware that we're supposed to limit our leaving the house to once a day unless essential but as far as I am aware that is for social distancing purposes. After 1 am the streets are empty so I figure a walk at that time is pretty safe. It's bloody hard or near impossible to social distance. In the shops one cannot avoid the wankers who are right in your space. Tesco have measures in place with an entrance and an exit door but do not enforce social distancing in store. In Lidl I had some nugget come and stand right up behind me when I was at the checkout despite markings on the floor and constant announcements through the public address system to encourage people to respect others and stick to safe distancing. In truth, it's impossible to safe distance in shops. There isn't the space to keep a two metre distance. It would take years to shop and with the amount of people needing essentials it's logistically impossible to facilitate. However, that doesn't mean there's a reason to crawl up someone's arse like the bellend in Lidl. Nor do eejits like the woman at the cigarette counter queue in Tesco need to stand less than two metres away from the person in front of her. I guess the thing is, we're not going to get the social distancing perfect but so long as we try our best, accepting the fact that it's not fully possible and some people are stupid and/or selfish we can lessen the foothold the virus has. All we can do is try.
It's surreal writing sentences like my last. Like I'm writing a scifi novel “ lessen the foothold the virus has”. But this is reality. It won't last forever but for now it's nuts. Then when we've gotten passed the isolation stage and the dust settles we'll see how the government intends to pay for all this. Because they'll want things to get back to normal. That means the people being milked to feed the machine. They'll likely blame the poorest and most vulnerable, scapegoating as before. It'll not be hard for them with the media aiding their every move. Then I see two possibilities. Most likely, people do what they have been doing already and back the government, buying their propaganda and watching the most vulnerable suffer, pay and die (like they've been doing for the hundreds of thousands dead due to austerity.... yep, hundreds of thousands, directly linked) or maybe people will wake up and shit will kick off. Riots.
I'm not saying these two scenarios are going to happen or that it's a binary junction. However, they are possible and not hugely unlikely. With better government, we'd have better options. But, for example, if Corbyn was prime-minister the place would be a shambles. Not because he'd be doing a bad or worse job. But the media would be blaming him for everything, they'd be making constant reference to his little red book and the fact this virus came from China. Fortunately, he didn't get elected. For his sake, for the sake of socialist values and so that everyone can see how Boris and his sociopaths handle us. The milking cows. But Me, I'm not a cow. I'm a rat with the heart of a wolf. I'm vermin so long as they treat me as such. I embrace my status. I've got nothing to loose. All one needs to do is hang on in there and box clever. It's my intention to enjoy my life, to grow and to learn. I was forged in hell, I didn't belong there but nevertheless from age ten I spent six years there. The tail end of the troubles in N. Ireland didn't seem too bad.
I watched the Brits walk about our estate, pointing their SA80's at our kids. It didn't seem that weird. In hindsight, soldiers patrolling a housing estate pointing their guns at children is not at all normal. But it was for us.
I witnessed a UVF parade complete with banners and paramilitary garb walk Cookstown Main Street at midnight. Brazen and secure. Few people saw it. I did. The police did nothing. There were no police. They always seemed to know when to appear and when to vanish.
As they did so many times before. Like when loyalist gangs came from the Shore Road in Belfast, up Skegoneill Avenue to the junction with Glandore Avenue in the early 2000's. Initially damaging cars to provoke a confrontation. Then leaving, coming back a short while later to petrol bomb cars and eject families in the dark of night. Protestants and Catholics. Some with babies too young to walk or speak. Forced out their back gates in the middle of the night. Antrim Road Police station just a seven minute walk from the scene. It took them over forty minutes to get there. A seven minute walk. Orchestrated. Planned. Not really a sectarian attack. That would have been far less sinister. It was about claiming the neighbourhood. It worked, they got the land for whomever it was promised.
I drove down Queen Victoria Gardens where my Catholic girlfriend and her kids lived at the time of the attack. (I strongly encouraged her to move her kids from that house, uncharacteristicly, she listened, thankfully). Anyway, I drove down her old street, the first house we shared was all new and nice. The whole street was improved. Her house bore the same number but has a driveway now. With a speedboat in the driveway. Fascinating. Back in the day I was unaware people in North Belfast had speedboats. It was by far the most run down area I've lived in. Serious social problems. Violence, joyriders, knife crime, paramilitary control. Police seemingly working alongside other dark forces. That's how it was. Nowadays is different. One might be forgiven for thinking the police no longer cooperate/work with the paramilitaries. Like the Rover Metro, the PSNI was rebadged. It's still a metro fundamentally though. Having witnessed so many acts in various areas of Belfast and beyond I have no doubt. Not everyone will agree, but I'm going on first hand experience, not what I've seen on the news. I was there. Witnessing how they operate, being in fear of my house being burned in the middle of the night. Being told by imbeciles who know nothing I was being paranoid. They'd claim the sky was green and know they are right. To the point you look at the blue sky and start to think, how do they not see that? But, they do not. Never will. They see what they want to see. People are easily fooled. It makes their life better to live in pig ignorance. They have more GCSE's, more paper degree's and it makes not one jot what others think and see.
Fuck it.
18.23
That went on a bit, It was good to flow again. From Hiroshima to the troubles. Maybe tomorrow I'll talk of something nice, some nerf subject that keeps people blissful and tranquillised. It's hard. Life is. Break time, mind tiered. Need a bath and to relax, to eat.
Fuck it.
18.23
That went on a bit, It was good to flow again. From Hiroshima to the troubles. Maybe tomorrow I'll talk of something nice, some nerf subject that keeps people blissful and tranquillised. It's hard. Life is. Break time, mind tiered. Need a bath and to relax, to eat.
30/03/20
Watching an old episode of tales of the unexpected. Just before I typed this I thought, no, I'm gonna call it a rerun. Then I thought no, I'll stick with me original statement. Kind of trivial but... Nada.
Watching an old rerun, watching a rerun, watching and old episode.
Three statements, all correct. That won't stop some folk telling one that the statement they would chose is the correct one. It is, however, there are many ways to look at a situation, trivial or serious, it remains the same.
For example*^*, there are people who are looking at this corona virus situation* as an awful tragedy. Which it is. Some folk will see it as an opportunity, which, it is. Each statement correct if it applies to the beholder.
For example*^*, there are people who are looking at this corona virus situation* as an awful tragedy. Which it is. Some folk will see it as an opportunity, which, it is. Each statement correct if it applies to the beholder.
*I will be using the term situation to refer to the current Corona Virus pandemic. I do not wish to keep referring directly to the virus.
*^* This symbol is so that I don't have to keep saying for example as it sounds wick and my English teacher taught me repetition doesn't make for good reading. Subjective, but a good general rule.
Then there are some people who'd might say to look at this situation as an opportunity is wrong, which may be true, depending on a lot of factors and is very much down to interpretation.
*^* In the event that big companies are profiting from this crisis then it is an opportunity. This is where personal morality or morality comes into play. Currently me writing this is taking an opportunity exclusively offered by the situation. Having read a piece on social media about Autistic people and isolation which spoke of how this situation effects some autistic people who spend most of there lives feeling isolated. That train of thought encouraged me to think and in turn encouraged me to take time to reflect and eventually dig out this old laptop I'm typing on now, and start writing a bit. Which is my way of getting through this strange situation*. It's certainly helping.
Anyway, that's the thing about autism. Which by the way is not a thing. Autism, is a word. It means nothing and yet it means everything. It's basically a spectrum of behaviour involving a different way of thinking to what is considered normal. It's bollocks. But necessary, necessary to explain to people that do not understand ones thought process and therefore motivations in any given situation. It's important to be able to have a label or term to give to people who think differently. Incidentally, it is my belief that every one person on this earth thinks differently. We may have the same or similar thoughts but we interpret them in our own way. So long as we are thinking for ourselves.... which, even when being fed what to think by external influences, we always are, on some level. I think.
Anyway, that's the thing about autism. Which by the way is not a thing. Autism, is a word. It means nothing and yet it means everything. It's basically a spectrum of behaviour involving a different way of thinking to what is considered normal. It's bollocks. But necessary, necessary to explain to people that do not understand ones thought process and therefore motivations in any given situation. It's important to be able to have a label or term to give to people who think differently. Incidentally, it is my belief that every one person on this earth thinks differently. We may have the same or similar thoughts but we interpret them in our own way. So long as we are thinking for ourselves.... which, even when being fed what to think by external influences, we always are, on some level. I think.
I could waffle on a fair bit but am not enjoying it so will summarise and move on. Reading an article written by an autistic author led me to writing this entire piece or whatever this writing is.
15.09
Gonna take a break. Need it. Getting better at that. Taking breaks.... Good stuff.
- Laters, I'm off again.
03/04/20
15.53
Friday, that was a long break. Rattling about the house. No sign of any end to the situation. Ice T liked one of my tweets. Gotta say that made my day.
Have spent a fair bit of time writing songs and recording brief half arsed cover versions of tunes I like. Madness It must be love, great tune. Deeply Dippy by Right Said Fred, lovely underrated tune and band. Two love songs... hmmmm. Hadn't occurred to me they were both love songs... There you go.... Made a few attempts at shit movie shorts. Both successful, both shit. Result. Had fun....
05.04.20
15.55
Two kinda hard days. Had a feed of rum and coke a few days ago. The hangovers are harsh with half a litre of rum in the system. Not a young man and no longer drinking often so when I do hit it hard, it hurts. Physically manageable but psychologically challenging. It's horrible but alcohol is no longer the centre of my life, my two months in Spain have given me a new way about me. Living in Ireland alcohol is a huge part of life but the Spanish whilst drinking often, sometimes daily, do not tend to hit it like us. The Irish. One huge cultural difference. There are many. One thing we certainly have in common is corrupt politicians. So that'll be the focus of the next verse or too.... bloody dyslexia, Two.
Right, I'm an armchair politics student. Never been to university. Any insight I have comes from watching political digest and pondering. Trying to distance myself from partisan thinking and remain as objective as I can. I'd call myself a socialist but I have not, nor do I ever want to be part of any fundamental movement that insists its ways are correct without considering contrasting views. True we're all human and get sucked in, especially when feeling threatened. Everyone, me and everyone else shits. And it stinks. The natural inclination is to join a group, but I've yet to find one that allows my thoughts to be my own and do not like being told how to think or having others agreeing based on the most popular members standing. We've the ability to think for ourselves. Thoughts are free, who can guess them (see Hans Litten, the man who sued Hitler).
Back to corrupt politicians... So I have lived in Three countries. Two or three. Four if one counts Spain but two months and stacks of visits don't count. So Two, or three. Firstly England. The land of my birth and formative years. Northern Ireland, the state or where I've spent most of my life to date. And Ireland. This is where it gets complex. Because Northern Ireland is part of Britain, however it is also in Ireland. Which is a bit of a melt. Carrying both good and bad. Obviously there is the division however, we in N.I. Are governed by three entities. Britain or England (mostly England) officially. However the Irish government has influence here. Some folk may not like it but it's necessary in order to prevent people blowing each-other to bits. Horrible, painful days the scars of which will remain for several lifetimes.
There are no bins in the Arndale centre (But that'll have to keep for later).
So, England/Britain has influence and/or governs N.I., Ireland has influence. Then there is our own government, sort of. This is where the fractured madness gets even more complex. The divisions within divisions. The main two parties when I first came to live in N.I. Were The Ulster Unionists led by David Trimble and the SDLP led by John Hume. UUP (Ulster Unionist Party) the main representatives of the loyalist/unionist population and the SDLP (Social Democratic Labour Party) the main representatives of the (Irish) Nationalist/Republican (I use this term loosely) community. This changed in 1995/96 circa Drumcree. At this time I lived in Mid Ulster, County Tyrone. Cookstown.
People were not treated equally. For many years this more or less half Nationalist half Unionist town had been run by Unionists for Unionists. The town hall was adorned with a large banner in red white and blue lettering. COOKSTOWN SAYS NO. A reference to the town being anti Nationalist in sentiment and direction. Cookstown endorses the union. Untrue and divisive. However things were changing. Drumcree marked a turning point, for better and/or for worse depending on point of view. My thoughts are both. Martin McGuinness came to mid Ulster, to fight for the seat. He was elected and things changed. This event was significant. Sinn Fein became the largest party representing nationalists and in turn the DUP replaced the UUP representing Unionists. Both parties further apart from the UUP and SDLP. Sinn Fein well educated and adept in propaganda (which was a gift as it wasn't difficult to have Nationalist communities feel they'd been getting a raw deal as they been treated as second class citizens for as long as they had existed. An assertion based on facts.
The DUP were also good at propaganda, using divisiveness to gain power, fueling hatred to achieve their aims. Perhaps they felt it was fair game as the IRA had been using bombs. It wasn't. Ian Paisley had been for years, whipping up hatred. Many young men joined up to loyalist paramilitary groups fueled by Paisleys propaganda. People died, were killed, made killers, murderers. This happened due to both sides propaganda, however. Sinn Fein couldn't hide their connections to the IRA whilst the DUP moralised about what they called “Sinn Fein IRA” as if they themselves had no blood on their hands. Which, from a point of view was true. They didn't have blood on their red hands. Their words however spewed blood. Former members of Loyalist paramilitary groups have on occasion sited how Ian Paisleys words and speeches encouraged them to commit atrocities. It was deeply upsetting seeing these once young men consumed with guilt. They did wrong, but spent their older lives attempting to make whatever amends they could. My favourite Irishman of my era is David Irvine, a Loyalist and a great man. Giving leadership to his people that led loyalists to think differently. His mentor was Gussy Spence. Both men former members of Loyalist paramilitary groups. A fact that didn't seem to bother the DUP. A party that was quick to condemn the IRA and anything they did whilst casting no public stones at loyalist murders or attacks. They used the Loyalists to do their dirty work, supporting their war against the nationalist population on one hand whilst getting on their moral soapbox in order to attack and condemn Sinn Fein. That's not morality, it's hypocrisy. Disgusting behaviour. They're still at it. Most recently issuing statements that led to death threats against Alliance party members. Disgusting. I do not support the Alliance, I have voted for them previously but never will again as I see them as grandstanding and smug. However, death threats inspired by the DUP were disgusting. This is why I believe the DUP to be the most toxic force in N.I. Politics. I long for the day when the UUP overtake them as the voice of unionism.
Sadly David Irvine died many years back of cancer. As did Mo Mowlam. Two major architects of the sort of peace we have today. The peace that the DUP take credit for.... Because that's what they do, start fires, then be seen as distant, latter coming in to pour water on said fires. No shame.
In fairness to Ian Paisley, he paid the price for his genuine efforts towards peace. Sharing power with Sinn Fein. An act that led to more equality and a fairer society in N. Ireland. The price he paid was to be kicked out of his party and his church. Both entities he formed. He had much blood on his hands, perhaps one of the worst architects of the troubles, but he made some amends before his death. God bless him for that. Not a popular opinion.
Now the DUP are fronted by Arleen Foster, a corrupt awful woman. Seemingly oblivious to the evil fires she flames. Moralising about Sinn Fein whilst ignoring her own paramilitaries crimes regularly and often. Sewing the seeds of division for her own ends. And deeply implicated in the RHI scandal but walking away with her head held high as if she shits gold, truth and holiness. Despicable woman. I see no such redemption in her future as I saw from Ian Paisley, but, who knows? It's hard to criticise overly judgemental zealots whilst perhaps being overly judgemental oneself. If the sickness here is down to prejudice I'd like to limit my contribution to said sickness whenever I can...
20.56
So yeah, Three governments. Confusing but, somewhat healthy. Maybe. None of which I trust. But what government can be trusted. People are people. That's one constant I'm sure will ne'er change.
All three governments are corruptible. Amnesty N.I. Tried to encourage folk to be more transparent with donations etc. Their campaign was less than successful although it maybe made some difference. Sadly Amnesty N.I. Seems to be run by people out of touch with the common man. The video they used to reach out to people was a load of theatrical wank. Very out of touch and self indulgent. At the time I tried to explain in the most diplomatic terms that is was unlikely to reach out to a wide range of people. They didn't appear to understand. Perhaps distracted by the smell of their own farts. Oooohh Vegan.
All three governments are corruptible. Amnesty N.I. Tried to encourage folk to be more transparent with donations etc. Their campaign was less than successful although it maybe made some difference. Sadly Amnesty N.I. Seems to be run by people out of touch with the common man. The video they used to reach out to people was a load of theatrical wank. Very out of touch and self indulgent. At the time I tried to explain in the most diplomatic terms that is was unlikely to reach out to a wide range of people. They didn't appear to understand. Perhaps distracted by the smell of their own farts. Oooohh Vegan.
It is incredibly important that we have transparency, however it has to be done in a way that is simple and easy to understand. Also, not forced upon people. Ram stuff down folks and they vomit. Amnesty were correct about the main issue. People need to be able to access a database of all political donations over £500 or £1000. Only then can we see who's up to what. People don't donate lavish amounts of money for no reason. If they do, it's rare. The public need to be able to scrutinise this data and draw their own conclusions. Data. Not news stories spun by self interested media outlets. This will happen anyway, but people need the source without having to request it under freedom of information requests. Democracy is a concept worth embracing but too much external influence corrupts the democratic process. This will always happen but we can at least limit it as much as possible.
I might come back to this subject but that's enough for now. Need a break. We all need a break from time to time.
06.04.20
12.35
I don't know what day of partial lock down this is. Sometimes not knowing what day it is, like Christmas. But without family. So, like Christmas. People in shops before Christmas rude and selfish only thinking of themselves. They are buying presents people. But people are only folk they know. Everyone else an obstacle. Not a person. Compare and contrast with the waves of hoarding, panic buying. I couldn't get paracetamol for days. I needed it. Neck and spine issues lead to shooting nerve pain up my arm and back into my spine shooting into my skull. It comes and goes, fortunately. It's horrible when it's bad. The point is I needed paracetamol as other tablets irritate the stomach. However whilst I did need paracetamol there were others worse off that needed it more, it was them I felt for. It's selfish to hoard. Toilet paper, Tablets, food. Money. So spare a thought for the one percent, they must feel terrible shame. Odd, as the most shamed in society tend to be the poorest most disadvantaged. The whipping boys. Bottom of the barrel. It's worth noting that I am not at the bottom, have been close but never at the bottom.
And with that slightly bleak train of thought it's time for a break.
10/04/20
13.29 Thursday
Last night was hard work. My relationship with my housemate is strained. We both have our issues and in truth, it's his house and he's kind of stuck with me. And I with him. So incredibly far from ideal. However, shit happens, it's about moving forward, dwelling on the past with one eye is very normal, glaring at it with both is not. Something that not a man or woman alive would do well to remember, myself included.
I cannot wait to get away but, I have no choice at all. It's just a matter of keeping myself in tact until I can be gone for this God forsaken climb'. Northern Ireland has taught me a great deal, I'm grateful for both good times and bad. I've learned from the bad and the good has made enduring the bad times just about bearable. Just.
Went to the local shop today. Big queue due to distance restrictions. There was an older lady behind me in the queue with a walking aid. About 4 people behind me in said queue. I waited until I was at the head of the queue and then offered her my place. She thanked me and refused, seemingly happy to chat with the man next to her in the queue. When I was paying she dandered into the shop ignoring all the one way signs designed to ensure social distancing. I thought, maybe she didn't realise or maybe she just thought, fuck that, I'm old and yall can lump it. I suspect it was the latter, I have to say I admire her if that was her stance. More power to you woman :-). God loves a trier. So he does.
Today will be a good day, I'm determined. Deep breaths and contemplation. At least, that's the plan. But as Neil young once sang “The devil fools with the best laid plan”. Not sure if it's applicable. Perhaps, either is or isn't. Not gonna get hung up on it.
Today will be a good day, I'm determined. Deep breaths and contemplation. At least, that's the plan. But as Neil young once sang “The devil fools with the best laid plan”. Not sure if it's applicable. Perhaps, either is or isn't. Not gonna get hung up on it.
Bath time soon. Then a massage. I've got this mattress that give a pretty good deep tissue massage. Not everyone's cup of tea. Pretty hardcore, like being assaulted but not hateful. It was the trauma that caused the need that was hateful, the massage simply lets it out. Both the trauma and massage are opportunities for reflection. I suppose everything is. But there's a time to survive, a time to smile, a time to grieve and a time to breath. There is a time for everything so long as time lasts.
Very much looking forward to my bath now.
Very much looking forward to my bath now.
09/04/20
11.49
So Matt Hancock, The Health secretary has said “Now is not the time to discuss pay rise for nurses”. A man who was videoed clapping with a huge smile on his bake (face) for our NHS.
It seems he has no shame. He is part of the worst government of my lifetime. At least in the time of Thatcher the Tories had people with a social conscience in their ranks. John Major for one. I may not have agreed with a lot of Tory policies but fully believe they acted in what they saw as the best interest for the nation. The current cabinet appears to be wilfully ignorant towards the suffering they have caused. The lives they have brought hardship, pain and suffering to. It's sickening. The use of spin to scapegoat Labour for all the financial problems that were thrust upon us due to a global recession. A global recession caused by greed, triggered largely by the sub prime mortgage fiasco in the USA. Not something Labour had much of a hand in. Not to say Labour were perfect, they did make mistakes. Mistakes in government are unavoidable. People are flawed, we all make mistakes. There are mistakes that cost the economy and there are mistakes that cost people's lives. The latter being difficult to stomach. However with humility and forward thinking we can learn and pay tribute to the families who've lost people and the people who are suffering by changing attitudes and readjusting priorities to put people first. This hasn't happened. The hundred thousand plus people dead due to ideologically driven cuts to social care and welfare have been ignored. How can this happen? How can these staggering figures be ignored. When I say figures I mean the death of a hundred thousand human beings. Bothers, sisters, sons, daughters, mothers, fathers, friends and loved ones. People. Human beings.
The adoption of a herd immunity strategy sums up this government. They didn't know it was the right direction to go but were willing to take a gamble. Another gamble, with people's lives. It didn't pay off. No apologies. None. Just more spin and propaganda in the face of terrible decision making. Then Boris Johnson gets sick. We're supposed to rally as a nation behind this buffoon. This sociopath, and his cabinet of the vile. Wilfully ignorant to the suffering of millions. But they've dug a hole, rather than addressing it, they keep digging. It may end up being a mass grave. I will not support them. The majority of tabloid media seems to be with them. That's a large part of why people have been able to ignore the atrocities of this government. Eventually I expect these media outlets will realise there is no one left amongst the great unwashed to scapegoat. At this point they'll find an MP or two to throw under the bus. Perhaps a doctor, an expert, a charity, who knows? They'll stick with Boris for as long as they can. If he pulls through, which, I hope he does. He needs to be held accountable for his tremendous mismanagement of the country during the worst pandemic in a lifetime.
A mixture of cynicism and observation has me thinking the condition of Boris Johnson is being used to create pro-Boris spin. Something which is almost bulletproof as we cannot criticise a potentially dying man. A man who, if/when he pulls through will claim to have heroically fought on the front lines against the dreaded virus. A virus which he may well have contracted due to his fuck-whit ignorance and slapdash attitude towards social distancing. Where he “the man in the street” he'd be slammed in sections of the media as being reckless. Deserving of his lot. Not Boris. He's heroic, stoic, inspirational. I'd say you couldn't make this shit up, but, well, that's exactly what they've done. To an extent it's worked. The right wing fanboys and girls are leaping on tasteless poorly thought out attacks on our sick prime-minister. They are tasteless and poorly thought out. Understandable as it may be that people would show a merciless disregard for the health of Boris it is not the way forward. It gives the right a stick to beat us with. They were doing pretty well without the stick, now, they've got leverage. I'm not saying one should wish Boris well, but to say he deserves it isn't smart. Even though, I can well imagine he'd say the same of a common man who'd put himself needlessly and foolishly in harms way. Boris is being defied, spun as some sort of saviour. He's long been styling himself as a Churchill figure. Even using the Churchill template to suggest comparison with his fight against the virus and Churchill's fight against the Axis powers during World War 2. The huge and very significant difference is, Churchill had the vision to see the impending threat of the Nazi's and Hitler. While PM Neville Chamberlain was unfortunately fooled by Hitlers charm and lies, Churchill was fully aware of the impending threat. Boris was wilfully ignorant and feckless. Chamberlain didn't have the same insight as Churchill through no fault of his own. However, he did what was best for the nation, resigned and made way for Churchill. Something which will not happen under Boris. Because unlike Churchill Boris puts himself before the interests of the nation. Always has, always will. Bearing this in mind the posturing of Johnson seeking to use the legacy of Churchill is deeply inappropriate on so many levels and incredibly disrespectful to the memory of Churchill. It's important to point out that Churchill wasn't perfect and made some pretty questionable decisions so it's important to realise this. Nevertheless, he led us to victory over the evil of Hitler and his evil cohorts. For this he deserves his place in history. Boris deserves to be held account for his failures, his lies, his mismanagement of the nation. His surrounding himself with the most despicable cabinet for hundreds of years. A cabinet that has more in common with the National Socialists than is in anyway acceptable. Sociopathy, wilful ignorance towards the ideological cleansing of the sick and the vulnerable, Scapegoating of minorities, lies, brainwashing. Propaganda, propaganda and more propaganda. Even attacking the left in a way that isn't exactly like the Nazi anti Bolshevism narrative used to demonise Russia and all its citizens but is certainly comparable.
Across the globe governments have lurched to the right. With Philippine president Rodrigo Duterte likening himself to Hitler whilst vowing to kill three million drug addicts, the President of the USA, Trump acting solely out of self interest, creating narratives to discredit news outlets that are understandably critical of his toxic presidency. Increasingly resembling and unhinged sociopathic dictator more similar to Hitler than any other president I've known. Even using anti immigrant rhetoric to get elected. Hitler had different focuses for his divisive hate speech but the results achieved the same aims. Power and manipulation. Across Europe we've seen right and far right parties use the hardship of the financial crisis to gain a foothold on the political ladder. Successfully.
A financial crisis that wasn't caused by immigrants, the poor, the E.U. It was caused by irresponsible financial practices in the financial sector. The super rich have gained wealth, the middle class have been squeezed and the poor have been screwed. The free market is a lie. It's not a free market if it's cartel led. Which it is. Huge corporations fix prices, ensuring the only people who benefit from the so called free market are the super rich and folk who suckle on their teats. We're being milked, the common man, the middle class, the lot of us. But milking us wasn't enough. Now they are squeezing us too. Setting us against one another. Using spin and propaganda to demonise the victims of the the financial system. They control huge sections of the media, the super rich. The One Percent. It's not fantasy. It's fact. Huge retail giants are coming to swoop and take away our supermarket chains. Asda, now owned by Walmart Inc. An American multinational retail corporation cited for having low wages, poor working conditions and inadequate healthcare for it's American workers, Wallmart is also vehemently anti-union. Essentially, Wallmart is a financial juggernaut, seemingly with no breaks. If one is in it's path, the outcome is likely that one will get squashed. The juggernaut won't stop, it'll keep rolling over more and more people with no thought of looking in it's rear view mirror to witness the remorseless carnage in it's wake.
Recently Asda were linked with a takeover of Sainsbury's. However Asda is owned by Wallmart so a more accurate description of the takeover would have been to state that Wallmart was seeking to acquire Sainsbury's. It was not reported this way. Which is very concerning. I could rant at legnth about this but will for now move on to Cadbury's.
Cadbury's was formed by John Cadbuy in 1801. A Quaker from a wealthy family of ten children. Initially opening up a shop in Bull Street Birmingham (1824) selling tea, coffee, mustard and hops and eventually drinking chocolate which was to become the future of the Cadbury brand. The Cadbury family set up various philanthropic organisations, they were particularly involved in setting up initiatives to support the welfare of their employees. The Cadbury family put great efforts to use their wealth to tackle issues such as alcoholism and poverty and were also very anti-slavery. In 1879 Cadbury's moved from central Birmingham to Bournbrook Hall, four miles south of Birmingham. They created a village and named it Bournville, an area for their workers to work and live. Being outside of the city the air quality and living conditions in Bournville were considerably healthier for the workers whose loyalty and hard work was rewarded with high wages and considerably better working conditions than many other industrial jobs of the time. Along with these measures Cadbury's introduced pension schemes and medical services for their workers. An incredibly progressive company.
In 2010 Cadbury's were subject to a hostile takeover by Kraft, a massive U.S. Company now owned by Mondelez international. A multinational company based in Chicago Illinois. A company very much contrary to the values of the philanthropic Cadbury brand. Upon Kraft's takeover of Cadbury promises were made that Cadbury's Somerdale factory, near Bristol would not be subject to closure. A week later Kraft issued a statement stating the factory would in-fact close claiming due to new information that it was unfeasible to keep the Somerdale plant open.
It is common practice for huge multinational companies to acquire smaller companies aggressively, ignoring the ethics at the heart of target companies in order to add to their portfolios. Initially these changes may seem to yield advantage to the communities containing workers of these industries however, all too often these acquisitions lead to a loss of employment for considerable numbers of workers and the erosion of the core values of the companies swallowed by multinational giants that rarely, if ever, have any sense morality within their fibres.
It is common practice for huge multinational companies to acquire smaller companies aggressively, ignoring the ethics at the heart of target companies in order to add to their portfolios. Initially these changes may seem to yield advantage to the communities containing workers of these industries however, all too often these acquisitions lead to a loss of employment for considerable numbers of workers and the erosion of the core values of the companies swallowed by multinational giants that rarely, if ever, have any sense morality within their fibres.
14.00
It's just occurred to me that the time on my laptop is wrong so it's likely that whilst the date stamp of these ramblings is correct. The time's may not be. Also, that it's entirely unimportant. If the writing is shit, the correct time won't make a jot of difference and if the writing isn't shit, incorrect times make no difference. I also have a major crush on Sophie Habboo from that Chelsea titts being pointless bollocks's. I've never seen the show once but it's advertised constantly on E4... Sometimes I pause the TV just to look at her face. I've no idea what it is, pretty sure I wouldn't like her if I met her but my word she has something about her I just cannot ignore.
Pretty sure this virus has us semi housebound humans horned to the balls. Must be weird for the women who garner a tremendous amount of self worth from the attention they get from lustful ballbags on legs. Good. Never understood listing to girls winge at school about blokes perving over them. The difference between two guys doing the same thing was so often defined on how said guy looked. Ie. If the girl found said boy attractive he was admiring her. If she didn't rate him, he was a perv. That's bullshit. Those girls were kind of wankers. I say kind of, they were wankers. Fairer sex my arse. Wankers are wankers, whatever they've got in terms of genitals. Ah, equality.... Or lack there of.
12/04/20
That last bit of writing was a bit of a rant. But that's how she flowed. So.
Jacob Rees-Mogg tweeted today “Jesus Christ is risen today. Alleluia”. Where does one begin with such a statement coming from such a man in such a government, a government heavily stocked with sociopaths that are not only indifferent to the suffering and deaths they have caused using the thin veil of austerity/balancing the books but appear holey deliberately wilfully ignorant of the deaths they have caused. One suspects they are pleased with the outcome. Over 100,000. A figure that has long risen past this conservative estimate. A point which I am likely to repeat many times. No apology shall be made for this repetition. This staggering number of deaths has somehow failed to make an impact on enough people to halt this ideological cleansing. Whether due to the inhumanity of the nation, the selective focus of the pro right media, others factors or all combined, this is sick. Not what should ever be allowed to happen in any civilised nation. Fundamentally unchristian, unethical and inhumane. It is necessary to make comparisons with other governments who placed such low value on human lives. Ideally the general population would have woken up to what is happening but seem wilfully ignorant of the deliberate not so subtle extermination of our poor and most vulnerable citizens. Human beings born into a system that kept them down. A system that favours the status quo, the Gods and Clods model. The Gods born in to privilege, the clods to serve the Gods, to do or die or both. Sick and inhumane. Jacob claims to be a Godly man. An architect, a fundamental member or this Tory administration. This administration that has been stealth-fully but not too quietly implementing their final solution to the impoverished problem. One Hundred thousand and counting. In England alone. This is deaths linked directly to austerity, countless others are suffering whilst members of the Tory government have been enriching themselves.
This was all happening before the Corona Virus pandemic. A situation that has highlighted the fact that, this government do not care about human life. They do not care about the good of the nation, about doctors and nurses. Carers, key workers, the old, the young and everyone in between. They care about themselves. It was them who mismanaged the NHS, underfunded and sought to destroy. It is there fault that medical staff and other key workers have died trying to aid humanity. Yet they continue to clap the folk whose lives they have had so little concern for. Why? Image. Illusion. Nothing more.
Boris is sitting up now, doing sudoku, watching Lord of the Rings and Withneil and I. Alleluia!
Boris is sitting up now, doing sudoku, watching Lord of the Rings and Withneil and I. Alleluia!
I'm very happy he has recovered, we cannot hold a dead man to account for his crimes against a nation. He will be held to account. Maybe there will be no justice? We shall see. This time he'll struggle to fain empathy, maybe, his colleagues will rally around him in classic sycophantic fashion. Using his struggle against the virus to deify. I'm sure the lords of spin are working on the next act. Feverishly devising strategy. Who to scapegoat next? Which political life preserver to throw into the sea? Which member of the cabinet shall be thrown under the bus? They'll need to ensure whomever they choose is vilified beyond all credibility. Can't have whichever inner circle cretin turning whistle-blower. I'm sure there are lists of possible high level scapegoats. All expendable. Even Boris. He's merely a figurehead. A puppet. For now he'll remain. Strengthened by the virus that has been killing the nation. Inwardly, I'm sure he's delighted. Another win for the Captain. The git that keeps on giving, no fucks. Not about us. Not about anyone.
I wonder who Boris roots for on middle earth? Does he root for Sauron? Saruman? Does he admire the orcs for their loyalty to the crown? Does he see the sacrifice of dwarfs, hobbits, elfs and men? Or does he look to glory? Which team is he on I wonder? How does he feel of Gollum? A character with issues, consumed by lust, nevertheless a sympathetic character. I don't see many, if any in his cabinet. Gollum has too much decency to fit in with his rabble. He's lustful and covetous t'wards the ring. But he is also torn. Between loyalty to the good and lust for the bad. These Tories appear to have no loyalty to the good. All they want is the ring, the power. Oh to be in Sauron's favour. To command Orcs, to posses lowly and expendable goblins to work in their mines, on their battlefields.
17.31 – Break time. Can proof read later. Got to coral the horses and give them the rest they deserve. Beautiful semi-wild stallions. On a somewhat excellent adventure. Or perhaps a Bogus Journey. Or, something in-between. Catch you later royal ugly dudes.
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21/04/20
Currently there are small groups of yahoo's in the USA holding public protests at their liberties being restricted due to the global pandemic. One video shows footage of an army type truck laden with gun carrying folk waving their high powered, military grade firearms in the air. Meanwhile the imbecile president of the USA continues to release statements appearing to encourage such actions putting lives at risk in more ways than one. British PM Boris Johnson continues to mismanage the nation. The media in general has failed to hold Johnson and his cabinet to account for their serious failures. It's a fucking joke.
It's difficult to know where to start, what can one say? Had Corbyn been elected he'd be being savaged by the media right now. It's hard to imagine he'd be doing a worse job than Boris, I'm pretty confident we'd be in much better hands. Unlike Boris and the sociopaths he surrounds himself with Corbyn appears to care about human beings. But he didn't get elected so it's a moot point.
Under the Tories the NHS has been seriously underfunded, undervalued and mismanaged. Medical staff are being forced to reuse PPE and in some cases work without it. The situation is getting worse, not better.
posted by rantomon @ 11:16 am
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